This is pretty funny.

[THZDax]

I recived this in an amail and i thought i would share it cause it is pretty funny. please forgive the >'s cause it is a forwarding.


>--------- Forwarded Message ---------
>Hi everyone! Enjoy the story for the day! Zoe
>
>Grass lawns have to be the stupidest thing we've come up with outsideof
>thong swimsuits! We constantly battle dandelions, Queen Anne's lace,
>thistle, violets, chicory and clover that thrive naturally, so we cangrow
>grass that must be nursed through an annual four-step chemical dependency
>program.
>
>Imagine the conversation God might have with St. Peter about this:
>
>"Peter, you know all about gardens and nature. What in the world isgoing
>on
>down there? What happened to the dandelions, violets, thistle and stuffI
>started eons ago? I had a perfect, no-maintenance garden plan. Those
>plants
>grow in any type of soil, withstand drought and multiply with abandon.The
>nectar from the long-lasting blossoms attracted butterflies, honey beesand
>flocks of songbirds. I expected to see a vast garden of colors by now.
>But
>all I see are these green rectangles."
>
>"It's the tribes that settled there, Lord. The Suburbanites. They started
>calling your flowers 'weeds' and went to great extent to kill them and
>replace them with grass."
>
>"Grass? But it's so boring. It's not colorful. It doesn't attract
>butterflies, birds and bees, only grubs and sod worms. It's temperamental
>with temperatures. Do these Suburbanites really want all that grassgrowing
>there?"
>
>"Apparently so, Lord. They go to great pains to grow it and keep itgreen.
>They begin each spring by fertilizing grass and poisoning any otherplant
>"that crops up in the lawn."
>
>"The spring rains and cool weather probably make grass grow really fast.
>That
>must make the Suburbanites happy."
>
>"Apparently not, Lord. As soon as it grows a little, they cut it sometimes
>twice a week."
>
>"They cut it? Do they then bale it like hay?"
>
>"Not exactly, Lord. Most of them rake it up and put it in bags."
>
>"They bag it? Why? Is it a cash crop? Do they sell it?"
>
>"No, sir. Just the opposite. They pay to throw it away."
>
>"Now let me get this straight. They fertilize grass so it will grow.And
>when
>it does grow, they cut it off and pay to throw it away?"
>
> "Yes, sir."
>
>"These Suburbanites must be relieved in the summer when we cut backon the
>rain and turn up the heat. That surely slows the growth and saves thema
>lot
>of work."
>
>"You aren't going believe this Lord. When the grass stops growing sofast,
>they drag out hoses and pay more money to water it so they can continueto
>mow it and pay to get rid of it."
>
>"What nonsense! At least they kept some of the trees. That was a sheer
>stroke of genius, if I do say so myself. The trees grow leaves in the
>spring
>to provide beauty and shade in the summer. In the autumn they fall tothe
>ground and form a natural blanket to keep moisture in the soil and protect
>the trees and bushes. Plus, as they rot, the leaves form compost toenhance
>the soil. It's a natural circle of life."
>
>"You better sit down, Lord. The Suburbanites have drawn a new circle.As
>soon as the leaves fall, they rake them into great piles and have them
>hauled
>away."
>
>"No! What do they do to protect the shrubs and tree roots in the winterand
>keep the soil moist and loose?"
>
>"After throwing away your leaves, they go out and buy something theycall
>mulch. They haul it home and spread it around in place of the leaves."
>
>"And where do they get this mulch?"
>
>"They cut down trees and grind them up."
>
>"Enough! I don't want to think about this anymore."
>
>"St. Paul, you're in charge of the arts. What movie have you scheduledfor
>us
>tonight?"
>
>"Dumb and Dumber, Lord. It's a real silly movie about..."
>
>"Never mind I think I just heard the whole story."
>
>--------- End Forwarded Message ---------