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Old 06-06-2001, 11:59 AM   #1
Dark Knife
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Ha!
Iceman hath released my chain and pointed me in this direction.
Firstly I sneak into the THZ base by clinging to the bottom of a beowolf tank returning from its patrol.
Sneaking in I then stop of at the unisex toilet facilities and lift all the seats, put yellow dye in them, and disable the little motion sensors that flush them.
Next I stop off at the break room and unplug the fridge and put an egg in the microwave setting it to cook for six minutes.
Finally I wax the hallway right outside the guard room and carefully exit the base. Making sure to lob a flash grenade in front of one of the cameras I set off the alarms that set my little tricks into action.
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Old 06-06-2001, 12:01 PM   #2
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BJ....I'm afraid... make the bad man stop... He knows our defenses... He's made it so that the toilets won't flush... VVH
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Old 06-06-2001, 12:24 PM   #3
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/me steps up and knocks on the door
(Parrot voice) Rahh! Who is it?????

Its da Plumber Ive come to fix the sink!!!!
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Old 06-06-2001, 12:41 PM   #4
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*having just seen the bathroom goes and lets in the plumber
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Old 06-06-2001, 01:02 PM   #5
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Obituary of Dark Knife:

Dark Knife of the xmen died today while trying to ride under a tank. He became “tribal road kill” after the tank when over a hill and came down too hard. The members of THZ have submitted Dark Knifes name to be placed in a hall honoring people like him. This hall can be found at www.darwinawards.com
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Old 06-06-2001, 03:52 PM   #6
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Tell that plumber to pull up his pants sheesh NASTY!!!
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Old 06-06-2001, 05:49 PM   #7
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Default ...somewhere on the road outside the THZ base

...Iceman and RedSirus hearing the news of DarkKnife's untimely demise race to the scene only to witness the police roping off the scene. Iceman and Red change their clothes and disguise themselves in long blue overalls, dirty t-shirts and bandanas tied around their foreheads. They then pick up some shovels and swagger over to the policeman in charge.

"Heyas, we is from the Sanitation department...we understand you have some trash to pickup..."

The police officer glances up and points his thumb over his shoulder at the body of Dark Knife whose body is compressed flat into the roadbed. "It's over there..."

Iceman and RedSirus saunter over to the treadmarked corpse and insert their shovels under DK's head. Leaning heavily on the shovels DK's head finally pops up! Leaning over they part the mop of black hair to reveal a small metallic hatch. Upon opening it they attach a cable from a connector in the head to a small black box. Red analyzes the data appearing on a screen on the black box. "We have a condition fuscia!!!" Iceman runs over to the XMEN Beach Buggy and pulls out a large capacity Diesel Truck battery, with the optional deluxe fur-covered cables and clips!

Iceman attaches the positive cable to DK's crotchplate and the other end to his Nose. Iceman yells "Fire in da hole!!!!" and closes a lever switch, thus releasing 1.3 gigawatts into DK's body.
The crotchplate glows red from the arcing energy. All of the sudden DK's body moves and two hands grab his crotch and a blood curdling scream is heard! "OUUUUUUUUUUUCCCHCCHHCHCHCCCCCHHHH!!!!!!"

A policeman runs over to see what is going on. "What the heck are you two doing?? Is he alive? "

Red rushes over and disconnects the cables from DK's body.

Iceman explains to the officer "No sir, he is quite dead...we are trying a new waste disposal method...onsite cremation. But it still has some bugs in it."

"But what caused the scream?" replied the officer.

"Oh, that was steam escaping from the lungs and exiting through the voicebox."

"Oh, ok, carry on"

Ice runs over and helps Red carry the body to the buggy. They lash him to the hood like a 10-point buck during deer season.

"Don't worry DarkKnife ole buddy!, you will be just fine...."

RedSirus raises his fist and shakes it at the THZ base. "HE WILL BE BACK AND I PITY DA FOOLS WHO DID THIS!!!"

Iceman and Red exit the scene with a spray of sand and the smell of ripe trout on the wind....


Last edited by XMEN Iceman[DTM]; 06-06-2001 at 05:52 PM.
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Old 06-07-2001, 03:02 AM   #8
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KitZune walks lazily into the break room, smelling something awry she pulls her arms in tight and walks over to the cupboards. She pulls out a bowl and fills it with THZ* cereal, mutligrain cereal shaped like discs. (Under the piece of paper tapped over the label on the box is the word Cherrios) She opens the fridge and mindlessly takes a carton of Milk and pours a viscous thick and oddly yellow chunky liquid onto her cereal. She stops on her way to the table, distracted by the newspaper saying "Gambit Rescues World at Zero Hour With Oversized Trout." She picks up the newspaper and puts down her bowl on the table then moves absently to the microwave, she pulls out the rather smelly egg and puts it into her mouth, biting half of it off. She walks, dripping of half-cooked day old egg, to the table and sits down. With a small grunt of approval of the news story she throws the paper on the ground behind her before taking a spoonful of her rancid mixture. She twists her nose up awkwardly for a second.

"Gryphon? What'd you do to the cereal, it tastes funny!" She waits a moment for a response but gives up after a few moments. She leaves the cereal on the table, finishes the rest of her egg and walks out of the breakroom to watch her early morning cartoons.
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Old 06-07-2001, 07:49 PM   #9
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Wink

I accidentally BUMPED into this thread....cause we need more action to follow.
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Old 06-07-2001, 09:25 PM   #10
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After spending a week in the bacta tanks, which also doubles as the X-men micro-brewery, Dark Knife crawls out.
First order of buisness is to find a new place to hold onto on the beowolf tank. Second is to view the havoc released in the THZ base recorded by stragiticly placed cameras.
Me watches the vid tapes alone in my little dungeon reserved newer members.
When the flash bang went off so did the base alarms. Four THZ security guards burst out of the security office each sliding a good twenty feet pancaking on a far wall.
Then after a search of the grounds and finding it to be a false alarm they headed to the bathroom to bleed off the stress. Of course being security they left some reallly nasty dookie and didn't bother to watch the toilets NOT flush.
Finally in the break room they find that the beer is now warm and they cannot warm up any food because some fool had cooked an egg in the microwave blowing the inside to Hades.
Right about then the sound of massive griping started drifting down from the bathroom where KitZune had just entered.
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