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Old 12-15-2002, 06:00 PM   #31
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Old 12-16-2002, 03:54 AM   #32
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To Laurelin
Yeah she just brushes me off. She just dosn't like to cuddle or hug or anything really. It's like she is totaly detached from the comforting emotions that most people have. And yes sometimes she gets mad as well. I don't know how many times that I have tried to talk to her about it only for her to brush me off, leave, change the subject, or get mad and do all of the above. It is all most imposible to talk to her about this, being that she dosn't think that its an issue or that important.

No I am not about to start chatting with anyone or cheating. I have gone three years now so I am not about to start now.

Any way thank you for your support it does help.
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Old 12-16-2002, 04:33 PM   #33
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Man I think we need to take a trip up there to Iceland and talk your wife . I can see how some women have troubles with sex and some just dont have that drive like others but its a relationship and there is someone else there that needs the love too .

It is an issue and you just need to keep bringing it up and try to get her some help or like Delukas said have a huge fight about it and see what comes of it. A good fight is healthy everyonce in a while, brings things out that need to be discussed. Laurelin said it like I would have. Dont shy away from the subject keep it going cuz its not fair for either of you. Let her know what its doing to you, if she cares she should understand and compromise or something. I just dont think she wants to face this issue for some reason or a deeper issue.

Cuddling and foreplay ALWAYS works for me :yup, or a good massage .

I hope she comes around sometime. And thank god for masturbation huh .

I hope she comes around sometime.
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Old 12-16-2002, 11:04 PM   #34
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I think if Xeno and her can work this out, she'll come around, and in the kitchen, the living room, the bedroom, the car.... she'll come all over!!
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Old 12-16-2002, 11:49 PM   #35
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Yes Stang, I don't know what I would do if I didn't have hands. But if anyone is planing to vacation in Iceland please let me know and I will help with the arrangements, and we can get togeather for an evening or something.

I love cuddling and foreplay as well and when we lived in Alaska I used to give her all over body rubs with lotion after her shower and that was almost always fun.

As for working it out Ashaman I hope that we can as well and I hope that you are right because I am the "try most anything once" type of person.
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Old 12-17-2002, 03:46 AM   #36
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Hmmm... Is there a possability that for some reason or another some repressed childhood memories surfaced? Or maybe some other assault that happened but she's to ashamed to mention?

I say this because some people who are victims feel that they somehow brought it upon themselves and it's their fault. I'm no psychologist but I've been around long enough and have seen cases like this.

I hope it's nothing like that but now days you can never be sure.

Just though of another thing. Who's idea was it to move from Alaska to Iceland? Maybe she hates it there but doesn't want to admit it. Or maybe she is holding some resentment for some thing you did but didn't know you did but she thinks you should have realized by yourself what it is with out being told. Boy do women love to pull that one on us men.

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Old 12-17-2002, 04:51 AM   #37
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i think i just realized the reason that my counterpart is against the stuff that i like( with help from what mobius stated). i never stopped to consider that she may have been abused in her lifetime. i should have been more considerate of her reasons why. all that i could think of was myself.
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Old 12-17-2002, 12:20 PM   #38
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Yah, that's definitely one of my favs
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Old 12-18-2002, 07:21 AM   #39
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to Mobius:
You could be right with your train of thought of what I do know of her life it would make a great lifetime made for tv movie. But this wasn't always the case, the lack of intrest started about 3 years ago.

The reason we moved form Alaska is I was in the Air Force at the time I was there and got out. We moved back to my home and tried to live there for about a year and we ended up seperating. She moved back to Iceland and later we decided to get back togeather. Its a little more involved than that but thats the general idea.
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Old 12-18-2002, 08:08 AM   #40
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Ah... I see.... Maybe she's just never felt reconnected with you? I hate to say this over and over again, but have you turned the romance notch up to Max? Really nice stuff, like flowers and dinners out on the town? Force your way back into her life... It just may be what she's waiting for.
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Old 12-18-2002, 02:20 PM   #41
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Well Im glad to hear that your not one of those guys that gives up and decides he's done all he could and turns around and cheats on their partner. Keep beating at it and some day hopefully things will come thru for you guys.

I too had some really bad things happen to me in my life and somethings I get shy or back off of. I have come along way though and improve constently cuz I dont want to let it control me, I want to be better.

Oh the old you should know what you did and Im not going to tell you ahhh memories, oh wait I still do it . You guys deserve it sometimes though, use that brain once in a while besides for computers and sex .
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Old 12-18-2002, 05:00 PM   #42
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There's more to life than computers and sex?
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Old 12-19-2002, 12:22 AM   #43
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To Spinning Hat:
If Stang says there is, there must be. Although I can't imagine.

Seriously

To Laurelin:
Well we really don't have the money to do things like that, but I do buy flowers when I have money and I am a GREAT cook and she gets wounderful meals at least 3 or 4 times a week and just last weekend we had a candle light dinner (alone no Kids). I try to be romantic but Johanna just isn't. She never really has been. Her idea of romantic is taking a hot bath, alone.

To Stang:
I do remember the way it used to be and back then our situation was diffrent and so was I. I made some huge changes in my life and for the better so I really don't want to do that again.
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Old 09-09-2004, 06:49 PM   #44
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WHIPS! CHAINS! STRANGLING! BITEING! SCRATCHING! PINCHING! pain turns me on!
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Old 09-10-2004, 06:29 AM   #45
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keep that quiet kitty, we cant let them know te he
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